I found this draft that I had started to write to Nimbus back on 1/30/2011
You may have guessed by now that we are not your biological parents. Although since we have had you since you were 21 days old I’m not exactly sure what you think.
We never had a puppy so young and like most new parents I’m sure we made mistakes. We weren’t even looking for a dog, never mind a puppy, never mind a puppy that had to be bottle fed and taught how to poop, and oh my god why didn’t anyone tell us that little puppies have full grown sized tongues. Or at least that was the way it seemed back then. We used to laugh that you had a cows tongue back when you had no teeth and would suck on our fingers, or our noses when we held you up to our faces.
We had no idea what you were or would grow up to be —besides a dog. We didn’t care, whatever you turned out to be was just fine was us. You were 3 pounds when we got you, today you are 105.
About the Zote what can be said?
There was just one, and now it’s dead.
- Edward Gorey
It makes me so unbearably sad that I cannot bear to be sentimental about it.
Nimbus had her surgery today. We dropped her off at 8:30 this morning.
My Grandfather also passed away today. When we all got together for his birthday in October he recited part of a poem: ” I am wounded but I am not slain”
I can’t find the full text although I believe it is Scottish. I knew what it was at the time but I have since completely forgotten.
Nimby’s tumor is still down 40% from the radiation but has done this weird thing where it annexed a biopsy incision site. It’s hard to explain and no one is quite sure what happened. According to the Oncologist this is an unexpected result.
However after consulting with the same surgeon we saw on the first visit, they said surgery this time was a possibility. It would debulk the tumor and they would try and close up the biopsy site which is now open/expanded. They felt that this would also relieve her pain although it won’t make her long term prognosis any better.
The Dr.s are good and we trust them. They aren’t trying to do anything extreme just for the money or to try something that probably won’t work.
We are dropping her off in the morning and she is staying overnight which we all hate. Brown is going to be super upset and lonely without Nimbus home.
Today started off at 3am where Monday left off. Nimbus got up to go out at 3am this morning. We don’t like her going up and down the stairs alone anymore. 99% of the time she navigates the stairs perfectly but every once in a while she slips on a step going down, or has trouble getting back upstairs. One of us goes down the stairs right in front of her to brace her in case she starts to slip.
This means that if she wants to go out at 3am then one of us is getting up to go with her. She has been exhausted all day today, spending the entire day in our bed. We had to coax her again to eat, and then she didn’t eat very much. We tried steak, canned dog food and even made her scrambled eggs to try and get her interested. The eggs got her interest more than the steak.
Boiled chicken is on the menu for this evening. If we can’t get her to eat that, I think Tuna fish is going to be the next thing we try. We are trying to find things that are high in protein that we can get her to eat. This is the same dog that has been gladly eating dry dog food for years and has never been a picky eater.
She was supposed to have a follow up visit on Thursday but we got it rescheduled to tomorrow since she has not been herself these last few days.
I decided to hang out in bed with Nimbus, finish watching Quark and go through my beading supplies. I sorted and re-bagged my beads to make it easier to see what I have. I took apart some vintage necklaces that I only wanted for the beads and I reworked some silver earrings that were clip on and put hooks on them.